Sydney’s Most Eligible

Speaking of crushing disappointments (see also here), Tom Scarpignato – Sydney’s most eligible bachelor – has employed the services of his Mum Rosemary to help him find a girlfriend.

Desperate 37 year-old Tom has turned to his mother (who was the one who proclaimed her son to be the ‘Most Eligible Bachelor’) to find him some love after failing to do so under his own steam. This was despite having tried “every conceivable avenue to meet girls – blind dates, friends of friends, rsvp.com, speed dating .. ”

I’m no Dr Phil, but frankly Tom, if you still haven’t found someone after all that, getting your mum involved really isn’t going to help. In fact, I’d go so far as to suggest that any girls that are interested in you because of your mum (and that meet her criteria) are precisely the sort of women you should be running from. Maybe that’s just me?

I can’t help but be reminded of the old TV series ‘Sorry’ with Ronnie Corbett. In fact the slightly scary looking Mrs Scarpignato reminds me of Timothy Lumsden’s mum too … spooky.

  

Good luck Tom. I’m sure you’ll be beating them off with a pointy stick anytime now! Failing all that, I hear Mali is pretty good for picking up chicks 😉

Des-perate and dateless

Filed under ‘don’t know whether to laugh or cry’. Take a good look at this fellow below. Hard to believe that such a fine figure of a man would be struggling to get a date, but poor old Des Gregor, 56, has just returned from a holiday of a lifetime in Mali where he had gone to meet his internet ‘girlfriend’. He also believed he was on a promise not just of some big-time loving but a dowry of $100K.

Of course, when Mr Gregor arrived, his ‘girlfriend’ had morphed into several large men carrying weapons and demanding money. Luckily he managed to get away relatively safely after some intense negotiations by international agencies.

Desperate Des was obviously sleeping the day they were handing out brains: he’d also previously been scammed in a Russian bride sting!

Hey Des – I have a bridge I’m looking to sell. I’ll throw in some free shopper dockets and an all-you-can-eat buffet token at Garfunkels 🙂

Oh wait, turns out he’s busy working with some nice folks from Nigeria who’ve promised him a cut of some deceased estate in return for
his bank details.

Lucky fella!